Plot: What’s it about?
After his eccentric, very wealthy uncle passed, Arthur Kriticos (Tony Shalhoub) inherits his estate, which means he has moved from broke to booming, thanks to the immense holdings of his deceased relative. The home of his uncle is a most unique one, as it has walls made of glass, tons of one of a kind items, and as Arthur soon discovers, it is home to some supernatural forces, in the form of ghosts. He knew his uncle loved to collect different things and his tastes bordered to the unusual, but he never even knew ghosts were real, let alone that his uncle would have collected the spectral creatures. But when he first moves in, the ghosts are trapped safe and sound inside a special machine, though Arthur manages to set into motion the movements that let them loose, which means chaos soon breaks open also. As the ghosts are releases, it becomes clear they are not friendly in the least and in fact, they wish to eliminate Arthur and his kinfolk, as soon as possible. Arthur manages to find some glasses that allow him to see the ghosts, but even with the help of a borderline insane ghost hunter, can Arthur reclaim the house from the spirits?
I’ve been rather reluctant to put much faith into modern horror movies, given the glut of self referential trash that’s been all the rage, but when studios begin to remake classic William Castle pictures, my attentions are raised. House on Haunted Hill was the first to be taken on and it was decent, but still fell eons short of the original, though it was enough to give me marginal hope for the next one, Thirteen Ghosts. I really like the original one and I knew this would be an MTV style assault on the senses, but even so, I knew I could count on flashy visuals and hopefully, some blood and breasts to enhance the experience. As it turns out, this is a modern day B movie and audiences were not pleased, but if you ask me, Thirteen Ghosts is a lot of fun. The visuals are intense and amazing at times, some of the best production design work seen in a horror movie for a long time, which adds a lot to the film’s atmosphere. I was also glad to see some nice gore & makeup work involved, as well as some naked flesh, though not too much. But in terms of writing, the film lacks any kind of depth or impact, so turn off your brain as you pop in the disc. This is not a horror classic or even a great movie, but it is better than most modern horror and deserves a look, to those interested. Warner’s disc is more than solid also, so don’t hesitate to check out Thirteen Ghosts.
I assume very few people will remember this picture at all, but of those who do, I doubt anyone will think much of the performances. This is kind of a surprise given the names involved, but when the material is so thin and problematic, you can only expect so much from the performers, even ones as talented as Tony Shalhoub. I’ve become a big fan of his work over the past few years, as he takes more high profile roles and continues to improve his skills. Now you wouldn’t know it from his efforts here, but Shalhoub is a terrific talent and often elevates the material with his performance, even here. Even with a boost however, the material is too weak to let Shalhoub deliver a worthwhile effort, which is a real shame. Other films with Shalhoub include Galaxy Quest, The Siege, The Impostors, Men in Black, and Paulie. The cast also includes Shannon Elizabeth (American Pie, Scary Movie), Embeth Davidtz (Army of Darkness, Bridget Jones’s Diary), and Matthew Lillard (Summer Catch, Senseless).
Video: How does it look?
As much as I wanted to give this film a perfect “5” for it’s video presentation, I couldn’t do it. Granted, with the amount of DVD’s that I have reviewed, I have given out my share of perfect scores. But with the purchase of my 16:9 TV, I have learned that most of those scores just weren’t accurate. Hence, I noticed that this film was just about perfect, as the colors were crisp, sharp and solid but it just didn’t have that extra “something” that made it stand out in my mind. But I can tell you that if it’s a great picture you’re after, the 1.85:1 image will knock you on your ass. Yes, it’s that good.
Audio: How does it sound?
While some scenes in the film had “normal” dialogue, some featured some of the most “room-shaking” sounds that I’ve ever heard. It’s not often that I get nervous of what the neighbors will think when I’m watching a movie, but this one (in some scenes) tempted me to turn down the volume. I didn’t, but I was tempted. The Dolby Digital 5.1 track is custom-made to this soundtrack which rocks and does convey the mood of the film. The dialogue is crisp and the surround effects are used to a great extent here, which does it’s best to heighten the mood of the film. Top notch, but yet not reference-quality.
Supplements: What are the extras?
While not sporting that much in the extras department, it does have it’s share. Namely the screen specific audio commentary is the most noteworthy feature and it does merit a listen. While not the best of commentaries, it’s certainly not the worst. The director and production designers do have a time with the track and seem very proud of their work here. The most interesting feature is the Ghost Files, which allows you to pick any ghost of your choice for a detailed, filmed history of the ghost. Granted they are not that long, but then again, neither was the film. Also included is William Castle and his thoughts on the new version of his movie. It’s text-only, but still rather interesting. 13 Ghosts revealed is a featurette that spans some 20 minutes about the film, but (and I hate to keep saying this) is just another extended trailer for the film. Still, it’s well done and fans of the movie will love it. Tricky, a music video by Excess is also included as are some limited cast bios and a theatrical trailer in anamorphic widescreen. Some DVD-ROM material is also included.
